Notes from Norman

From the Sunday Night Update

GLITCHES IN PRINT

As an aspiring writer, I often pay attention to miscommunication in print. One day this week, I happened to be looking at the soup cans in the grocery store. One label read, “Vegetarian Chicken Soup.” Wouldn’t you think that’s an oxymoron? I got an e-mail message that included a request for Bibles and hymnbooks. According to the writer, “We have a lake of Bibles and hymnbooks.” What’s that about? Is that a different twist on censorship? Are they throwing Bibles and songbooks into the lake instead of burning them? Surely he meant, “lack” instead of “lake.” We see so many glitches in our local newspaper that Miz Ann is thinking about applying for a job as a proofreader.

Kevin Costner and his band put on a show here in town this week. Did you know that Kevin plays the guitar and sings? It was front-page news. In fact, the review of the show was the lead article on the front page. I can understand why Kevin did it. I doubt that a performance by his band would ever become the front-page news in the Los Angeles Times. Ann counted three or four glaring typos in that article. Kevin was probably thinking, “What do you expect from a hick town paper?” Their worst faux pas didn’t have anything to do with that. They ran a notice in a small box on the front page that said, “Because of a press breakdown, your paper may be late today.” Let me see if I got this right. They’re going to tell me that my paper may be late, but I won’t know about it until I read it in the paper. Will Rogers once said, “All I know is what I read in the paper.” It’s a good thing Will isn’t around today. He wouldn’t know very much.

The last one is not a glitch. It’s just something that happened, and I thought it was incredibly funny. At church we publish an order of worship. I didn’t see this week’s order until I got to the building this morning. I was preaching today, so the order included my sermon topic. My topic was “Rules for a Fair Fight.” Little did I know that the worship leader would have the congregation sing, “The Battle Belongs to the Lord” as soon as I finished. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. People who don’t attend church miss out on a lot of funny stuff.

posted by Norman @ 6:18 PM